Where it happened: my parents bathroom
All right, now listen up. I don’t have to lie about any of this to you fuckin’ jack-offs who read this perverted shit, so don’t fuck with me! When I was 6 1/2 I was in my parents bathroom, playing soldiers in the bathtub with my GI Joe’s. My nanny, Facunda, came in to towel me off. I noticed she was looking at my twig and berries more than usual, so I started to laugh and everything. In some fucked up language, she started to curse at me and call me things like “dirty”, and “chico malo”. I kept laughing and she pulled her top down. A strange sensation overcame my twig, and I started to feel like a log. She made me pull on her nips until she screamed (my parents were at work I suppose), and then she stood up. She yanked down the ol’ squirrel covers and pushed my face into her pubes. They were all curly and smelly, and it felt like something bit me on the face. All of a sudden, I couldn’t breathe, and my mouth was all full off stuff that feels like week-old Jell-O. I put my hand up to free my face, but it slipped right in! She started yelping and cursing me in some stupid language again, with all this stuff running down my arm. Man, it was fucked up!! Then she all fell over and shit and i thought she was dying but it turned out I was driving her over the deep-end….again. yeah so after that she learned how to lube the old womb cannon real good and lets just say I grew up REAL FAST. Now, I have trouble keeping girlfriends cause I wanna keep shoving stuff up their snatches!! Fuck you, Larry, and you can suck my La Lu dick.
Signed, Dick-Hard Trotman and Abba